The Truth About Motherhood: Jessica Piani, full time mum

“Childbirth didn’t pan out as I’d expected it to; it was very different to my ‘birth plan’. I’d wanted a natural water-birth in the birth centre but my son had other ideas.” Jessica Piani on her introduction to motherhood…

Jessica Piani, 31, lives in Kensal Rise with her partner and their son Knox, 14 months.

“I always planned on having kids; I worked with kids before falling pregnant. We were about to go travelling for six months and then SURPRISE! So it happened very quickly. It was unplanned with the timing.

Childbirth didn’t pan out as I’d expected it to; it was very different to my ‘birth plan’. I’d wanted a natural water-birth in the birth centre but my son had other ideas and I was sent to the labour ward because there was meconium in my waters.

I felt very well informed before going in to give birth, because I’d done lots of research

The birth itself wasn’t as bad as I anticipated. I used gas and air – however, he got stuck at the last push so it went to forceps. I feel that I was calm and not scared because my best friend who is also a midwife was there the whole time (and of course my partner). Hypnobirthing removed the fear aspect of it all.

I felt very well informed before going in to give birth, because I’d done lots of research. I wanted to know EVERYTHING. I feel I was like a walking encyclopaedia… Knowledge is power.

After the birth, I was in a lot of pain due to stitches and bruised coccyx, so I was pretty out of it most of the time. To be honest, I couldn’t really enjoy motherhood in the early days. It’s all very hazy. They never tell you just how bad it can be postpartum.

I was surprised that the recovery took three months. After that, I was able to move about more and I started to get into it. It’s only now, a year on, that I actually enjoy it.

Before embarking on motherhood…

I was a nanny/childminder’s assistant for three years before becoming pregnant. I worked ad hoc towards the end of my pregnancy as after about the sixth month, I physically couldn’t keep up with the kids.

Now I have my own child, I’m not sure I will return to that job. I feel I need a break from being “mum”. I’m still trying to figure out what I’m going to do, which is a little scary…

Jessica Piani, on motherhood…

Becoming parents has made me and my partner feel we are even more of a team now. But we also bicker about totally different things now. The main one being who’s had the most sleep.

Motherhood in one sentence? The hardest thing I’ve ever done paired with the realisation that I do anything.

I wish I’d been told before embarking on parenthood… That it’s a never-ending learning journey. And that not every day is the same, so don’t panic if things are tough. Tomorrow is a new day.

If I could go back in time – I don’t think I would change anything…

My advice to expectant parents? Take each day at a time. Don’t worry. You can do it. Sleep. Be kind to each other.

The greatest challenge I face, as a mother, is… Trying to raise a boy who will treat women with respect and love. Letting go of little things like mess. Oh, and trying to get him to sleep longer at night!

What makes it all worthwhile? His smile. His laugh. His emotions. Him.